The end of the regular season brings with it the end of the inaugural season of the Totem Poll. I know you all will shed a small tear, choke back your emotions and wonder where all the time went but there is a time for every purpose; a time to laugh and a time to weap.

Turn, turn, turn.

Buck up friends, there’ll be more discussion and analysis of the upcoming playoffs and perhaps — just maybe — a new kind of Totem Poll. We can rebuild it. We have the technology.

On with the show:

1. (1) Brandon Bobcats (20-2) — You really aren’t getting points for beating someone who had their right hand tied behind their backs, but we’re certainly not dropping them. It should be noted that, for the second straight year, a handful of members of the Bobcats made their point well known to a local reporter who again short-changed them in a pre-season prediction and suggested a 17-5 final record. Their response? Twenty and two. Twenty and two, chanted repeatedly. Point taken.

2. (2) Calgary Dinos (18-4) — Not sure that this was how they wanted to go into the playoffs, but the Dinos — despite a road loss — maintain our No. 2. Now they get to relax for a week and wait for a division-final opponent that most certainly won’t be a cakewalk.

3. (3) Alberta Golden Bears (16-6) — Saskatchewan got a battle in its final week while Alberta had Lethbridge at home. The Bears get to host the Huskies in playoffs but should be wary of a team that has knocked off its higher-ranked conference rivals one time each in the past two meetings. In other words, beware of Dogs.

4. (4) UBC Thunderbirds (18-5) — The T-Birds continue to win and this week they served notice to their post-season opponent (UCFV) that getting out of the first round of playoffs is going to be even tougher than you think. Sign me up for a T-Bird sweep.

5. (5) Saskatchewan Huskies (12-10) — There was strong consideration given to moving these guys up a spot after a win over Calgary but just can’t see dropping anyone that is above them. However, it’s duly noted that three of our top five here are from the Central Division, making those playoffs the most intriguing of them all in Canada West.

6. (6) Victoria Vikes (14-9) — Who knew that the Pacific Division was in fact giving out bye weeks before the post-season: Victoria goes into the second-season dance after a road win at Thompson Rivers.

7. (9) Fraser Valley Cascades (11-12) — A split against Victoria (W) and UBC (L) indicates the Cascades are capable of beating anyone. Unfortunately their first-round foe is the team that has hung three of those Ls on them.

8. (7) Simon Fraser Clan (12-11) — Here’s where SFU gets the benefit of the doubt: While it’s not looked upon highly to drop one at home to a seven-win team, the absurdity of having to play three games in a row against the same team trumps that.

9. (10) Winnipeg Wesmen (9-13) — Two losses surely didn’t move them up the divisional standings but they get a bit of a nudge here for playing the No. 2 team in the country without two fifth-year starters. No one, however, goes into Regina in playoffs and emerges and the Wesmen will be hard-pressed to do that this weekend.

10. (8) Regina Cougars (10-12) — With the home-court in the first round sealed and nothing else to play for, you wouldn’t begrudge Regina for going through the motions on Saturday night. But going into the post-season on a loss is rarely a good thing.

11. (11) Manitoba Bisons (6-16) — The Herd gets to close the season on a win and — again — think about next year.

12. (12) Trinity Western Spartans (7-16) — A tumultuous season to say the least but the Spartans at least have a bright light to look forward to with Brian Banman returning after a year off and rumblings of former Canadian college player of the year Jamie Vaughan perhaps playing in Langley, B.C..

13. (13) Lethbridge Pronghorns (2-20) — A young team will be a year older in 08-09 and the Horns are banking on a couple of divisional rivals dropping a little after graduating a slew of players.

14. (14) Thompson Rivers WolfPack (2-21) — The end has come. Although that bright light at the end of TRU’s tunnel might be an oncoming train.

An interview with UBC Thunderbirds head coach Kevin Hanson; a recap of the greatest Super Bowl ever; reaction to the Pau Gasol/Shaquille O’Neal trades; and an episode of Blindside featuring thoughts on the best/worst looking male athlete of all-time, the worst TV commercial of all-time, and the best sitcom theme song of all-time. Plus, Swatter and Larks campaign for delegates in a political battle for the ages.

 

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The final seconds ticked away on an unforgettable Super Bowl, then time stopped … but Bill Belichick just kept on going.

The head coach of the New England Patriots couldn’t bear that one last tick of the University of Phoenix Stadium clock. It would appear not even the heat of the Arizona sun was as unbearable as the collective gaze of the millions who watched as Belichick and his perfection-seekers fell one win short of the goal they seemed to believe they were entitled to.

To be sure, the Patriots won some fans over during their headline-making run, but previously-indifferent fans were likely more swayed away from cheering for the juggernaut. No one cheers for the house in Black Jack and no one applauds when Bill Gates earns another billion. So if everyone truly loves the underdog, anyone not associated with the Pats surely was cheering for a moment like the one Sunday night when Belichick put his tail between his legs and hustled off the field even before the game was officially declared over.

Belichick, lauded regularly for his ability to make in-game zigs to other coaches’ zags and celebrated as one of the geniuses of the game, was undoubtedly exposed during the game — even if it was just a smudge — but he was doubly outted in those final seconds.

While the media and his minions gladly treated his tight-lipped curmudgeon act with revelry — as if it was the lovable part of the evil genius disguise — the truth of the matter is that Belichick is not a likable protagonist and Sunday he showed it in his most classless way.

He sought out Giants coach Tom Coughlin to shake his hand and, of course, everyone followed, making the playing field a sudden mass of humanity that took the spotlight from what should have been an all-about-the-Giants moment and turned it back on himself, one last selfish act in a season that was full of Belichick egotism.

Belichick coming on to the field will be forgotten — probably already has by many — and In the grand scheme of things that gesture amounts to very little considering the greatness of the game that was played. But leave it to Belichick to upstage the biggest sporting circus of the year and, somehow, get away with it without any reproof.

Afterwards, he was his typical self in the media — talking little, saying nothing — and giving all the answers no one wants to hear.

An abstract response like “they made more plays than we did” followed by an equally recondite and uninformative “we knew it was going to be a battle” is not what viewers and fans signed up for. It’s not asking much that, even after a heart-wrenching loss, a coach stands forward like a man and does what is part of the job description and deals with his questioners. Belichick, however, doesn’t fit that description.

On Sunday night, Bill Belichick showed himself as the classless knave. Ironic that, after 19 weeks of seeing him in front of us, it only took him one second to do it.

The second edition of the Cishoops.ca men’s basketball media poll was released on Tuesday and I’m again curious about a few things. And you can group the coaches’ poll in there, too.

Unlike the coaches’ poll, our media poll doesn’t have a rule that stipulates teams can only drop three places per loss. Lose a game? Let the freefalling begin.

Last week I championed the Brock Badgers for a higher spot in the rankings and — of course — they went and lost at Windsor in a game that could have served them well on the national respect metre. As it is, I’m just left wondering what to think of these guys. Despite Ken Murray’s rationale on podcast No. 8, I’m still wary of betting on them. Thing is, I’m also wary of betting against them.

(Which leads me to this: Are there really any teams in Ontario that you honestly trust? Sure, Carleton. OK, fine. Then who? Ottawa? Toronto? Windsor? If you have to bet with your life on a one-and-done game — neutral site — featuring one of the heavy-hitters from another conference, are you really, truly, honestly so utterly sure that you can go ahead and pick one of those aforementioned? I was whole-heartedly believing in Ottawa’s athleticism and ability to challenge for the OUA. Then I watched the Two Gs turn into a one-man show, not hit a shot and look pretty pitiful against the Blues on their own floor. Any of these teams could win that one-for-it-all game, but I certainly wouldn’t put my feet up and relax if I had bet on them.)

But I’m also very surprised that Alberta couldn’t make the leap into the top 10 in the coaches’ minds. So now I introduce you to a new segment I’m calling: Larkins Jinxes Another Team By Jumping To Its Cause.

In this week’s episode, Larkins spoils the hopes and dreams of an Alberta Golden Bears team that has happily flown just a wee bit under the radar and sports one of the best players most of the nation hasn’t seen before. Starring Alex Steele as the scoring threat, Don Horwood as Dr. Tech, and a cast of 14 others you’ve likely never heard of.

Alberta finds itself on the fringe — No. 12 to be exact — in the most recent coaches’ poll and I honestly believe them more worthy than that spot. The Golden Bears own two wins over the Brandon Bobcats, a pre-season vic over Ottawa and an overall mark of 19-7 is nothing to scoff at.

The knocks? Yeah, there’s a few. The loss at Manitoba looked about as attractive as a dolphin tattoo leaping over Rita McNeil’s belly-button and not playing any games over Christmas tends to not sit well with coaches — many of whom did play during the holidays — who are voting on these things.

Still, the Bears went to the coast this past weekend and pulled off something that — by all accounts — hasn’t been done before, and that’s be a non-Pacific team to go in and take both the Victoria and UBC games. It’s no easier this year and I think that feat itself deserved more than a one-spot bump and an extra 52 points in the rankings.

This is not by any means the most talented team Horwood has had in Edmonton, but it once again falls in the lineage of quality teams at U of A. When was the last time you looked at Alberta on the schedule and assumed a W? Horwood’s crew is led by the ultra-talented, and multiskilled, Steele but also boasts some good veterans — 6-foot-11 Richard Bates understandably stands out here. Andrew Parker is ridiculously athletic and has suddenly found a decent stroke as well (who knew?), and while not gigantic, the Bears have good team size and can’t beat you on the boards.

Take this for what it’s worth: This year’s Bears maybe don’t do anything GREAT, but they do everything pretty well.

So, unlike past teams at U of A, this year’s version might not jump off the page, but they are worthy of keeping your attention before flipping to the next one.

A couple of things for anyone interested:

• For those in Winnipeg, Thursday’s women’s and men’s basketball games, and Saturday’s women’s and men’s volleyball matches between the Winnipeg Wesmen and Brandon Bobcats will be broadcasted live on Shaw TV in Winnipeg. Start times are 6 and 8 p.m. both nights.

• Secondly, a note to those who wait breathlessly for our podcasts (all four of you), that tomorrow night’s podcast will feature UBC Thunderbirds head men’s basketball coach Kevin Hanson. Hope you have a listen.

We’re at that stage now in the Canada West where there’s a lot of games (read: practically all of them) that seem pretty pointless. Playoff spots are all but all sewn up and, if this were a video game, you’d be very likely to just hit “simulate” on the rest of the season so you could get to the playoffs.

If only life had a simulate button. In the meantime, here’s the latest stacking of teams in the CanWest. I’m going to play video games now.

On with the show:

1. (1) Brandon Bobcats (18-2) — They surely didn’t look like an 18-2 team on Saturday when they shot 33 per cent from the field and uglied out a 60-50 win at Regina. But the sign that the Bobcats are still as dangerous as you expect them to be was the eight-point deficit they wiped out in the final six minutes of Friday night’s win.

2. (2) Calgary Dinos (17-3) — The Dinos know where they’re finishing but a team that puts up 101 and 98 points in two wins doesn’t look like one that is taking its foot off the gas. But they spread out the minutes and played without Ross Bekkering … so someone’s down there on the pedal.

3. (5) Alberta Golden Bears (14-6) — That’s more like it. The Bears made a major statement by pulling the rare twin win out of UBC and Victoria. If this is a sign U of A is peaking for playoffs, the rest of the Central be warned.

4. (3) UBC Thunderbirds (16-5) — After a middling 2-2 start to 2008, the Birds have won four of their last five. There’s a lingering thought, though, that depth is a nagging issue. As such, they don’t inspire the same confidence as past editions.

5. (6) Saskatchewan Huskies (11-9) — Someone asked me this week if I thought Sask could be a darkhorse. My response was no, but they can scare the daylights out of teams so long as Andrew Spagrud gets going. So… take that for whatever it’s worth. They’re better off playing in the types of games that the team below them thrives. Which brings us to …

6. (4) Victoria Vikes (13-8) — The Vikes lock teams down better than anyone else in the conference, but there’s another side to that equation. Somewhere you have to score points: Vic is losers of its last three and, in that stretch, topped out at 66 points scored.

7. (7) Simon Fraser Clan (12-10) — Not much to play for besides momentum next weekend against Trinity Western: The Clan aren’t catching Victoria for second and it would be an NYG-sized surprise to see Fraser Valley win out to earn a tie for third.

8. (9) Regina Cougars (9-11) — Hung in tough with Brandon at home but couldn’t take advantage of BU’s horrendous Saturday night and blew a late lead Friday. Still, they rise up because of the team at No. 10. More on this in a minute.

9. (10) Fraser Valley Cascades (10-11) — Winners of four of their last five, the Cascades have benefitted from a puffball sked in that time (wins against Lethbridge, TRU, Winnipeg and Manitoba). Wake up call this weekend at Vic and UBC should ensure they’re far from groggy when playoffs come around.

10. (8) Winnipeg Wesmen (9-11) — An absolute dry heave on Friday night by these guys. On top of that Erfan Nasajpour gets hurt and then Winnipeg mails it in against Calgary on Saturday. Now the Wesmen have pretty much lost any hope of hosting Regina in the first round. The “Final Days of Erfan Countdown” is at four games and counting.

11. (12) Manitoba Bisons (5-15) — The road trip to Lethbridge came at the right time: The Bisons snapped a four-game losing streak and moved up to the highest spot they’ve been in this poll … if that amounts to anything.

12. (11) Trinity Western Spartans (6-16) — How did things get worse for a team that has lost its last six games and eight of the last nine? Divulge you dressed an ineligible player in the first semester and give back three of those Ws, which were already scarce enough in Langley.

13. (13) Lethbridge Pronghorns (2-18) — The Horns got to play spoiler on Friday. When you have one win in 18 outings, there’s little else to get amped up about.

14. (14) Thompson Rivers WolfPack (2-19) — It will all be over soon. In the meantime, fans in Kamloops are now allowed to start watching the WHL’s Blazers or TRU’s men’s volleyball team. At least they’ll be in the playoffs.